In what experts are now calling a tradition rather than an update cycle, Ambulance NZ leadership figure Drone has once again reassured the public that a “major bulletin” is coming in April — a statement that has been received with the same cautious optimism normally reserved for lotto tickets and Auckland traffic clearing on time.
The announcement follows what insiders describe as “a solid effort” of hinting, teasing, and vaguely gesturing at progress for the better part of… well, no one’s actually sure anymore. Historians are still debating whether the first mention of the ERS server predates sliced bread.
Drone, speaking to a gathered crowd of mildly sceptical paramedics and FiveM enthusiasts, confirmed that the long-awaited ERS Server is “definitely coming,” marking its second anniversary of being almost ready. “We’re really excited about where things are at,” Drone reportedly said, while carefully not specifying where that actually is.
Sources close to the project have indicated that development is currently in the “final stages,” a phase believed to last anywhere between three weeks and several geological eras.
Meanwhile, anticipation continues to build around the promised Black Hawk rescue helicopters — a feature that has achieved near-mythical status within the community. Some users claim to have seen one once, briefly, in a dream. Others insist it’s been spotted in development screenshots, usually just out of frame or “still being textured.”
Local Ambulance NZ members say morale remains high, largely due to the consistent reassurance that everything is “just around the corner.” One staff member commented, “At this point, I’ve got corners for days. We’re basically in a maze.”
Despite the ongoing delays, Drone’s leadership style has been praised for its unwavering commitment to optimism. “You’ve got to admire it,” said one observer. “Most people would’ve run out of ways to say ‘soon’ by now, but Drone keeps finding new ones. It’s honestly impressive.”
As April approaches, the community now waits with bated breath for the promised bulletin — widely expected to include exciting new phrases such as “very close,” “nearly there,” and the ever-popular “worth the wait.”
Until then, Ambulance NZ personnel are advised to remain calm, stay hydrated, and avoid looking directly at any timelines, as sudden movements may cause them to shift.
More updates coming soon, in July 2028.
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